Pause. Rewind. Play.
Since the commencement of the lockdown, I started carrying around a post-it note and pen with me everywhere I go. Every time I notice a moment that I wish I had a camera, I would jot it down. Before the lockdown, there were many times when I was out and wish I had my camera with me. I wanted to explore and challenge myself to see if this was true even when I’m stuck at home with one other person.
With the help of my partner, I re-created a few of those moments. More often than not, these moments were times I felt a sense of joy, calm, or need. Also, as I kept taking notes and took photos, the more I realise they weren’t moments that are too memorable if I hadn’t taken the time to write it down. These photographs became a small reminder of the little joys I can find throughout my day.
However, as I worked on this project, it took an unexpected turn. I was notified that my application for a visa fell through, and in a short span of a month and a half, I was forced to pack up my life and dreams I had here in the US. As I prepared, I came to realise that all the small moments I had jot down became precious memories between my partner and I. The only phrase that kept creeping into my mind as we recreated these scenes later on became, “I’m sorry.”
